Milliners Invade Hollywood: Part Seven

Shirley is back to co-host but she's on a sugar high so I can't be responsible when this post goes off the rails.  Who gave her the lollipop?  This is certain to get out of control...I smell a set up!

Alice White had the most beautiful skin....Just flawless!  Shirley: "Turbans are for old people and con artists!" I don't understand where you are getting that from.  Shirley: "Gloria Swanson and The Great Wizzo who took my mother for $40,000 in 1932 over reading fortunes."  I am going to move on and take that lollipop away! We WILL get through this without angry emails. Oh, but I'm curious. Did your mother play the ponies? And who would trust any man wearing a turban named Wizzo? Or is Gloria Swanson in fact the Great Wizzo?  This is all so confusing.

Anita Page was quite the glamour girl. Shirley: "But did she have Oomph, "IT" or anything that stands out?"  She did have the label of The Girl with the Most Beautiful Face in Hollywood!  Shirley: "I thought that was Hedy Lamarr's label?"  Hedy was the most beautiful woman in films. Apples and oranges! Shirley: "I'm confused."  So was Hedy! She was Austrian.

Barbara La Marr and before you ask, she was the girl who was labeled as Too Beautiful. Shirley: "She should have sued Hedy!" Perhaps if narcotics anonymous had been invented in the 1920's she would have been around to do so.   Shirley: "Apples and orange groves." You need to work on your analogies! 

What do you think of Ann Sothern?  Shirley: "Maisie took a day off!" Thank God! I don't care for Maisie. Shirley: "Nobody does!"  I'm starting to like you a lot Shirley.

I adore Bette and she looks so pretty here.  Shirley: "She's a kicker!" What do you mean by that?  Shirley: "She kicks her co-stars then acts like it's an accident." That sounds like a vicious rumor! Shirley: "Perhaps you should Google Celeste Holm and James Stewart's shins pictures!"   I think I'd prefer to not know, keep thinking she just had the Jimmy Leg.  But don't Google Jimmy Leg. You'll have nightmares.

Jeannette MacDonald. Now she had a beautiful face! Shirley: "You warned me not to make any Nelson Eddy jokes so I'll just say that I don't like her shirt. It is making me want to throw up!"  Well, you've eaten your weight in sugar so don't go blaming Jeannette for your misery even though I cringe when she sings.  Shirley: "Is it true that people who love musicals don't like you very much?"  Absolutely!

Joan Blondell is working the feathers here.  Shirley: "When your agent tells you to take chances you shouldn't take it out on roosters. Some stars don't have sex appeal no matter what!" I'm not sure what's more disturbing. That you know what sex appeal is or that you blamed Joan's agent and not that crazy June Allyson for this fiasco. I've never trusted June.  Shirley: "Dick Powell was a shrimp so both of those ladies were hard up!"   Meowwww, Hiss!  Another reason to dislike musicals if you ask me! Way too much drama.

We can all agree that Dolores Del Rio was very beautiful! Shirley: "Did she have a label?"  Not officially. But her nickname was Lolita.  Shirley: "Why, did she date Charlie Chaplin at 15?"  No! And I refuse to disparage Charlie. Although that was a good one Shirley.  

Mary Carlisle. Another talented blonde.  Shirley: "I bet when she sees Mae West she runs the other way."  Who doesn't, men included?  Shirley: "Gold digging body builders from Venus beach."  Awww, that's not fair. Mae was lonely.

Jayne Mansfield looks very sweet all covered up for a change.  Shirley: "When you aren't that talented it is important to not be covered up."  Don't let Mamie Van Doren hear you say that! I don't want to see another 200 publicity stills of her in tight hot pants and a bra.  Shirley: "They can't all be Julie Newmar. She has a following."  I think people are too afraid of her not to adore her.

Ruth Hussey was such a talented actress. Do you like her hat Shirley?  Shirley: "She's much prettier than that Claudette Colbert who got a lot of lead roles."  Yes, I don't consider Claudette a beauty but perhaps it was her hairstyle. She reminds me of my aunt Bertie who had horrible hair and severe eyebrows. Thank God aunt Bertie chose collecting snowbabies instead of a career in Hollywood. That would have been an embarrassment.  Shirley: "Who does she get to dust all of those snowbabies?"   Her nieces and nephews! We all have an aversion to dusting and chotchkies but that's for another time. 

Claudette Colbert is working those wonderful bangs! Shirley: "I feel set up! I'm rooting for Ruth Hussey."  This really isn't a contest Shirley.  "I just ripped Claudette a new one so I think it's best to be quiet going forward."  Well, go home and watch Cleopatra then meet me back here next week. Trust me! You'll have plenty to talk about and my apologies to Claudette in advance.

Well, that's all we have for now. Stay tuned for more fabulous hats and Shirley.  Please leave a comment and let us know which hat was your favorite.  

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