I know you've all missed Shirley and her candid thoughts on old Hollywood hats so she's back! Let's get started before Ivan G. arrives with his petition to shut this blog down.
For the three of you who don't know who Shirley is, it's Shirley Temple, my co-host. She's not holding back either so if you're ready, so am I!
Wynne Gibson is divine in her beanie and jewels. Shirley: "She smokes so imagine this is Joan Crawford at 12. By 30 Wynne will regret this and she'll be at a pawn shop, hawking her jewels for food and Camels with her looks gone!" Let's take it easy on the anti-smoking campaigns!
Vivien Leigh, always so sweet and innocent and put together! Shirley: "You obviously haven't read any of Olivier's sappy love letters. I bet her knees are quivering here!" You're just awful, Shirley..I'm going to have a talk with your mother!
Elsa Lanchester looks eloquent and so pretty. I'm a big fan. Aren't you, Shirley? Shirley: "I think she's in mourning. It continued for at least 10 years." That's a third of her marriage to Laughton! Shirley: "I know! I'm surprised it wasn't more too!"
Norma Talmadge, in a very good photo and a very cute hat. Shirley: "She should stick to profile shots like this. From straight on she could pass as Robert Mitchum's double and I think she borrowed that dress from the not famous sister!" There's nothing wrong with her dress. Shirley: "Not if you're a potato farmer."
Marion Davies is lovely in one of her 30s publicity portraits. Shirley: "Clearly, this was a couple of years after she was hunting down booze in San Simeon elevators like a truffle hound. She's bloated up like a deer on a salt lick bender!" Thank goodness, Hearst is long gone, otherwise you would be ending up washed up on a beach in some shabby luggage. Shirley: "I'm being nice here. I didn't even mention her eyebrows!"
Toby Wing looks very pretty here. Shirley: "She's a round faced, Jean Harlow want to be but I do like her blouse and the fact that she didn't go over the top with red lipstick!" Well, there is that!
Hope Hampton has left me speechless so I'll leave it to you, Shirley. Shirley: "She's like a Mae West meets Joan Blondell hybrid here! Is this supposed to be a tribute to sailors or did the costume department throw everything white into the photo hoping she would be a good sport about it?" I'll never look at tassels in the same way! Shirley: "Same here! She's also ruined Veteran's Day, the color white, pleats and bamboo wallpaper for me!" I'm just thankful you gave black turtlenecks a pass, Shirley!
Lana Turner looks great in black. Who doesn't like Lana? Shirley: "Another star in mourning but this time she's in mourning to stay out of prison!" I know who doesn't like Lana Turner....Bottom tier gangsters!" We better move this along.
I love Betty Compson's hat. Shirley: "She's clearly snubbing Mary Pickford here. You can tell by the smirk on her face that she wants to rip some ringlets from their pasted on roots!" Well, we all love a good cat fight. Dig those two divas up!
If you want to dish on these hats please leave a comment and just know that I have no control over Shirley. Well, I do but what fun would it be to ban my imaginary co-host?
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